Get R Done

 I need to mow the lawn. We had so much rain a week ago that the blades truly need cut about twice a week. I actually enjoy mowing the lawn. It's good exercise, I love to be outside and moving, and I tend to be quite efficient at mundane repetitive tasks, so back and forth over a lawn is peaceful, easy and satisfying. Plus of late, my schedule is a bit more flexible than Brad's.

I didn't always mow the lawn in our marriage. The first time I ever mowed was when we lived in Green Bay. It was our second home. The lawn mower scared me, so I left Brad to do it. Plus I got this advice, "If you do it, you'll do it forever." Guess what? That's pretty much true. Once I learned how, the burden of lawn mowing has fallen squarely on my shoulders. Recently I read a comment where a woman said, "Don't start doing something for him/her that you don't want to do for the rest of your life." It there truth in the saying? Probably so. I have never made it a habit to make Brad's lunch. He does it every day. I do, however, iron his clothes and I know if I didn't he'd wear them wrinkled. I reminded me of that very first day I mowed the lawn. And I can honestly tell you, Brad has not mowed the lawn here in Alabama in two years. So yes, there is truth to it.

Does that mean you should never - either of you - learn to do these things? Personally, I believe everyone should be competent enough to take care of themselves in everything they do (except for special circumstances). I taught both of my kids how to do laundry, iron, mow, do dishes, clean the bathroom, use a drill, weed, change a toilet paper roll, write a thank you, etc. This is just common sense. It is important to never expect your spouse will do specific things in your marriage. You want to discuss that before you marry so that there are no unrealistic expectations, or things that slip through the cracks because you thought someone else had that covered. Who will balance your check book (and, yes, you should balance it every month)? Who will do yard work? Who does dishes? Who cooks? Who cleans the bathroom? Who fills the car with gas? Who buys birthday and holiday cards? You may laugh at these things, especially if you've been on your own and have done these for years, but trust us that these things will come up.

So frankly we believe you should both know how to do everything - unless it is something that requires a special skill - and voluntarily do those things as needed. Expecting your spouse to do anything is just selfish. Do everything as if serving Christ Himself and not your spouse. As it says in Colossians 3:23-24, "Whatever your task, put yourselves into it, as done for the Lord and not for your master, since you know that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward; you serve the Lord Christ." In the words of Larry the Cable guy: "Get r done." And do it joyfully, speedily and correctly the first time. It will save a bunch of time and patience.

Discussion: Have you talked about who will be responsible for specific duties in your home, or will you both do everything? Is there something you've never done you'd like to learn? Are you afraid if you start something you'll do it forever?

Prayer: Lord, You've given us minds and bodies to get the job done, whatever it may be. We pray as we work we serve You and do so with much joy. Thank you, for all the skills we have, Lord. In Jesus, Amen.