Happy Wedding Day ... A Doubly Blessed Day!

This is it. This is the day! First off, "this is the day that the Lord has made, and we will rejoice and be glad in it." (Psalm 118:24). But we have an even greater reason to rejoice in it, for today our daughter will become Mrs. Robert Goggin!

This celebration has been more than a year in the making, starting with an engagement on the shore of the Atlantic Ocean in Garden City Beach, South Carolina. After ring purchasing, dress hunting, date selecting, venue picking, decoration buying, shoe shopping, flower perusing, tux sizing, gift registering, invitation designing, ceremony scheduling, music choosing, vow writing and so much more, there is little left to do except enjoy! You both will have plenty going on this day, and will be surrounded by all the family and friends you love (and some family and new friends you've not met yet) to celebrate one of the greatest days of your life. So breathe in and breathe out. Relax. Take in every single - and married - moment. Remember how you feel this day. Remember the love you feel right this very minute for your beloved. Remember the expressions on each other's faces the first time you see one another. Remember the faces of those who have traveled from so many different places to witness this special event and then party with you to commemorate it. We are thrilled for you, Rob and Ayla, on this day. We know a few tears will be shed, but not tears of sadness, not even the slightest bit of sadness. For this day God the Father will take two souls and make them one! He will intertwine your lives as only He can do, bless you both and watch with pride as His precious children, designed for one another, unite before Him. And that brings the greatest tears of all ... complete and perfect joy.

We love you both so very much. And know you may not even read this until this day has passed. We have shared all we can think to share with you both about marriage and weddings. Now, it's up to you. You will have this to look back on, should you need a reminder of the words spoken here. Just pop your subject in the newly added search box and posts will pop up to help you out with that issue. This is our gift to you. We never wanted to say that we didn't tell you everything we possible could to prepare you for this special day.
 
On this date 28 years ago, we said our I do's to one another. My Dad whispered in my ear just as he was about to escort my 22-year-old self down the aisle: "How about we surprise them all and skip." Now, I wish we would have, but his suggestion made me giggle and relaxed me just before that momentous procession. And there at the end was your breathtaking Daddy. God did a beautiful thing that day bringing us together. We have had quite a journey in our marriage, and we've shared a lot of it here. While we celebrate the beginning of your marriage today, we celebrate the anniversary of ours. For us it is, and now will ever be, a doubly blessed day.

May the Lord bless your wedding day. May the Lord bless your honeymoon. May the Lord bless your marriage. May the Lord bless your adventures together. And may the Lord bless your future family. Remember that it's all about Him and you are good to go.

Now we gotta get ready. We have some celebrating to do! Happy Blessed Wedding Day!

Discussion: What are you thinking about in anticipation of this day? As the day comes to an end, what moments stand out for you? How was God glorified in this day?

Prayer: Heavening Father, creator of marriage, we praise your name. We thank you for 365 ideas for our children as they prepared for marriage. Father we ask for your presence here on this day. May your Holy Spirit fill our children from head to toe. We pray you are glorified. It is in Jesus name we pray, Amen.

A Kernel Of Truth And Wisdom

Just as I was about to blog about whatever advice the Father had given me for you both today, I opened the front cover to a wedding scrapbook I made back in 1987. Glued on the inside cover is a brown envelope with a letter inside. The letter was written Oct. 16, 1987 by Jadoosh, your Grandpa Anthony Walter Zimanek, Jr, to your Daddy and I on our wedding day. Rather than sum up the letter for you here, I am going to transcribe it as is. What he wrote nearly 27+ years ago, still works today. Thought you might want to hear it yourselves:

Dear Brad and Jill,

         It is a custom in our family, that some one attempt to share some insight into marriage when a couple is entering Holy Matrimony. (Your great-grandfather Antone Grygiel was known far and wide in N.E. Wisc and even people that didn't know him personally, requested that he talk to the young couple.) Only pray that you are able to catch a kernel of truth & wisdom here & there from this letter.

         First of all know with your hearts and souls that you are loved by your parents as well as many others, but most of all Christ loves you. He is always there and will help & bless you if you call about Him. He may not answer your prayers exactly the way you want them, but he does hear you. Pray every day and keep Him a part of your lives. Its so easy with our materialistic & busy world to neglect honoring & confiding in Him and His Blessed Mother.

         You are both Christians and you were taught marriage is sacred, so commit faithfully to one another that his is the person who I'll share my life with, for better or worse, until death will we part. After the first blush of wedded life, I promise you there will be arguments, disagreements, bad times, good times, sorrow, joy, hurt & all the things of life. The thing that must overshadow everything is love & I don't mean it only sexually. Talk out your problems in love, pray together & be a real team. The one biggest & hardest thing I believe to overcome is selfishness. You must wrestle with it always. But someday, if you really work at it, you'll realize your partner is of the same flesh & spirit & if I may quote Ephesians "He who loves his own wife (& each other) loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, on the contrary, he nourishes & cherishes it as Christ also does the church, because we are all members of his body made from his flesh & bones. For this cause, a man shall leave his father and mother & cleave to his wife & the two shall become one flesh."

         Also make up your minds that whatever your circumstances, whether rich or poor, you will do your best in that station of life. If poor, so bit it, God loves the poor more than the rich. Just make the best of it & comfort one another always.

         If you are blessed with children, raise them Christian. And if you do one thing for them, make sure you outwardly & physically show affection for yourselves in their presence. Obviously, hug them a lot & make sure they know you love them & they count. Children will test your endurance, your patience & your being, but we have accepted them as a part of our Christian lives & we will be held accountable before God, I am sure.

         You will be in our thoughts & hearts until we pass on, & in our souls always. We love you, we wish you the very best, but most of all we wish you love & remember always we really have 1 objective on earth & that is to pass the test & save our souls. Do it together & help each other.

         May Christ be with you always! Yo truly are 2 very handsome, intelligent,special, loving people.

                                                                      Love always,

                                                                      Anthony & Barbara Zimanek 
                                                                      (We hope both your Mom & Dad)

P.S. Trust each other too & do not be a jealous worrier. Remember you married each other & no one else in the whole world.

I think that says it all.

Discussion: What of the above letter touches you the most? What is something you specifically need to work on that he writes about?

Prayer: For generations this Zimanek family has passed on marital advice to young couples in love. We thank You for being the foundation of that advice and that it never changes. You are the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. May we heed all You say. In Jesus, Amen.

Give and Give

Brad and I spent five months apart before our wedding. Brad had already moved to Tennessee for his first job. I was living with my mom in Pittsburgh (the same house Ayla is staying in right now - in the same room I slept in, actually) in the months leading up to our wedding. We were getting married at Memorial Park Church in Allison Park, PA, near where my mom lived. I took a few part time jobs to hold me over till the wedding. I worked as a freelance writer for the local paper and worked as a cashier/manager for a hardware store called Busy Beaver (yeah, that was it's name, sigh).

When ringing up people's orders as they were checking out, often people would notice my marquise engagement ring and ask all kinds of wedding questions.

"How did he propose?

"Have you got a dress yet?"

When are you getting married?"

"What are the colors for your wedding?"

"Where are you getting married?"

"Where will you honeymoon?"

And inevitably after the wedding questions came the unsolicited marriage advice. I got a bunch of: "Don't do it." I got a few: "Just elope." "And I got a lot of: "Marriage is give and take." But the best advice I ever got was this sweet, short statement from an elderly woman. She said, "Whoever tells you marriage is give and take is wrong. Marriage is not give and take. Marriage is give and give and give again."

I will never forget those words. They really hit home. Because I think I really thought marriage was give and take. A compromise. But it's not. It can't be. Paul wrote that "husbands should love their wives the way Christ loved the church" (Ephesians 5:25) giving Himself up for her. And that is certainly not a give and take relationship. God gives and gives and gives again.

On those days in the future when you attempt to compromise ("Sure you can get that, if I can get this"), remember that marriage isn't about that. It is about how you can out-love your spouse. What can you do to make their day better, easier, more joyful? If everyone remembered to do that, can you imagine how beautiful marriages would be?

Discussion: What advice have people given you both about marriage? What does the advice above about giving mean to you?

Prayer: Father, we thank you for your Son, Jesus Christ, who loves us so very much. Thank you for the example He set. Help us, Lord God, to be selfless in our relationship, giving out of the love we have. We love you, Father. In Jesus name, Amen.