Find A Balance

Right after Daddy and I married, I moved into what was his apartment in Murfreesboro, TN, which was now to become "ours." He had sweetly prepared this new home for us, even getting a few pieces of furniture. Having just graduated from college and living in the dorms all four years, neither of us had any furniture, kitchen supplies, beds or tools. So everything was new. So when I first walked in the door, what should greet me but three giant inflatable sports balls hanging from the ceiling. Not even kidding. A giant football, baseball and basketball. Pennants, baseball helmets and sports posters on the walls. Oh, and a Moosehead beer light by the bed. So the first thing I do when I move in ... take it down. This was our apartment living room after all, not our college dorm room. Thus the take over began.

Just like it's often comically portrayed on some television series of women taking over the home, getting rid of some of the husband's scarier items and doing the interior decorating, we were following that pattern. Somethings just had to go. First off, he was making room for a new wife. Secondly, that new wife was putting together her first home and thirdly, we had different ideas of what that home would look like, from the arrangement of furniture to what went the walls. And honestly, those discussions came up every move we have made in our marriage. It got to a point where your Daddy felt like he got the garage walls for his things while everything else in the house was mine or my idea (more often than not for good reason). However, he was right in that he needed his space, too.

Thus someone coined the phrase "man cave." The place where he could take over in the decorating, arrange the furniture the way he wanted and unwind after work or on weekends. Your Daddy wanted me to make sure I told you to be sure to allow Rob his place and space. Likewise, to be conscious that to a woman, her home (and her husband's appearance for that matter) are an extension of her. Thus, if it doesn't look they way she wants to come across, it can weigh pretty heavy on the way she thinks people view her.

So, find a balance. If you are both good at decorating and designing, compromise should be easy. If there is something your new spouse will have that one or the other of you just do not find appealing, explain why and see if there is a place for the item.

In our case, I do not believe the Moosehead light ever saw the light of day again. And the inflatables ... well let's just say, they make great beach balls.

Discussion: Who will be the decorator in your new home? Will there be a space for each of you? Is there anything either one of you have they will not work in your home together?

Prayer: Father, we thank you that we are two different personalities with different likes joining together. Give us grace to see what our loved one sees in their personal things. Helps us to created a beautiful home together. In Jesus, Amen.