Makes Cents

"Money, money, money. It's a rich man's world" say the lyrics of the Abba song. I don't know that's it's a rich man's world or that "Money makes the world go around," as Liza Minnelli and Joel Grey sing in Caberet, but I do know that wise application of it certainly helps in living in the world. A good budget will certainly go a long way. You need to know what you have, where it's going, what your goals are and still save for emergencies with what the Lord blesses you. Now you know I am horrible with math, budgeting, balancing and the like, but I can definitely tell you who is good at it: Dave Ramsey.

Ramsey has a class called Financial Peace University that I am going to recommend you both take together. The class teaches you how to manage your money, beat debt and build wealth. It teaches you to pay in cash, have emergency funds in savings, how to invest and budget. It's a fabulous class. Your Daddy and I commented that we wish we would have taken a class like this when we were first married rather than when we were in our 40s, but regardless, even at our late date, it certainly helped us. In Luke 24:28, Christ says, "Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it?" Planning is key. The slogan for the class is "If you live like no one else, later you can live like no one else." It teaches you how to build credit, without a credit card, how to give, spend and plan. It's a wonderful course. It is costly to take, but it is worth it. You can take it online or even do a home study, but we recommend taking it in a small group because of the feedback and advice you get. There is more information at daveramsey.com/fpu.

Money is not the goal. It is not the be all, end all. Having loads of it is not the answer to all problems. Daddy said in worship Sunday that Jim Carrey once said, "I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of, so they can see that it's not the answer." The answer is Christ. The goal, focus, the be all end all, is Him. Scripture tells us that you "cannot serve both God and money"(Matt. 6:24). 1 Timothy 6:10 says, "For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs." And in Hebrews 13:5 says, "Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So serve God, do not love money, and be content.

Learn to make good financial choices. In the long run, it will be such a blessing to you both. And getting a head start in the wisdom of it before you get married, makes cents ... ahem, sense.

Discussion: Do either of you know how to budget? What do you think of credit cards? Would you be interested in taking an FPU class?

Prayer: Lord, you have blessed us indeed with what we have. Help us to be good stewards of it. Lord, where we have opportunities to learn about managing the resources you have given us, open up the time and finances for us to invest in that learning. We love you, Lord, and pray you bless us to be a blessing to others. In Jesus, Amen.

Taking the Guess Work Out

I love when you and Kayla post what you want on Pinterest. It is so helpful for people like me who are clueless as to what to get as gifts for people. To me, Pinterest "Want Lists" are the Gift Registries for the non-engaged. Which is why I always say "post wisely" when you're on there and update often. I've just recently created my own Wish List board since I see how helpful they are.

I was tickled to hear you and Rob had began wedding gift registry lists (Target and Bed, Bath & Beyond, thus far). It will eliminate guess work in the gift hunt for your needs as newlyweds and with regards to colors, patterns, brand in the gift details.

It was Marshall Fields in Chicago that apparently started the first gift registry in the 1920s and Target which put it online in the 1990s. No longer would newlyweds receive three blenders and four gravy boats. Once those purchases were made, the lists were updated. Of course, not everyone updates the list, so count on a few doubles. And don't count on everyone sticking to the list either. Daddy and I got two ice buckets and we never even asked for one. Praise God for the folks who give you gift cards so you can get what you need. But I will say, if it wasn't for the wedding registry, I doubt your Daddy and I would have the china and crystal sets we have. We could have never afforded it. And they are items that we not only cherish, but use often.

I don't think you've totally completed your lists yet, so I would say pick durable, high quality items. Now that doesn't necessary translate to more expensive, so keep that in mind. Do your research. Know that you will use these gifts either forever (china) or until they die (towels, sheets, toaster) so you want things that will last. You may get upwards of 20 years out of some gifts, so choose wisely. Go room-by-room through your home to see what you really need. If people call to ask you want you specifically want, don't hesitate to have a list of items at hand to help them out. Remember that many folks are traveling great distances to come to the wedding, therefore their attendance at the event may for some be all the gift they can give.

"Ask and you shall receive." (Matt. 7:7) That is God's advice in prayer. And in this instance, works as well. Even God tells us what He wants from us in his Bible Gift Registry of sorts: in Psalm 51:17 "The sacrifice acceptable to God is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise."  1 Chronicles 16:28 says, "Bring your offering and come to worship Him." and Psalm 116:12-14 says, "What shall I return to the Lord for all his bounty to me? I will lift up the cup of salvation and call on the name of the Lord, I will pay my vows to the Lord in the presence of all his people." Romans 12:1 tells us, "I appeal to you therefore, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship." So now you know exactly what you can give God ... a humble spirit, your offering, sharing Christ's salvation with others, praying, being faithful and giving yourself completely to Him.

See, isn't it nice to not have to guess in the gifting?

Discussion: Have you gone through your home to see what you need? What is something you really hope you receive from the wedding or showers? What advice have you gotten from newlyweds about gifts?

Prayer: Our Father, how blessed Rob and Ayla will be by the souls how come to the wedding, and doubly blessed by any gifts they will receive. We thank you, Father, for the guidance you provide and the greatest gift of all in Jesus. Amen.

How Do You Know?

Monday Joe Reeves was at our house with his chainsaw cutting long, thick branches into logs for our Christmas Caroling Campfire scheduled for Friday night. Out of the blue he shared a story about a man who was dating a girl and asked him, "Joe, how do you know when she's the one?" I thought Joe's response was precious. He said, "When she is the first person you think of in the morning and the last thing you think about at night. When doing for her becomes more important than doing for yourself. Then you'll know." This man married the girl he was dating.

I nearly melted when I heard him say this. Joe is married to a good friend of mine, Martina, and to know that is how he feels about her means the world to me. And knowing what a good man Joe is, I know Martina is in good hands.

That last part of his advice, "when doing for her becomes more important than doing for yourself," is key. Recently a friend posted on Facebook about how her husband gave up tickets for the SEC championship game Saturday night to help his wife out for an event at church. This fellow is a diehard Alabama fan and to know that he had tickets for this game and subsequently gave them up for his wife, speaks volumes about his priorities, his love for her, his family and God. Now, I'm not saying he didn't give up those tickets begrudgingly. I'm sure he ached a bit not being at the game, but he did it nonetheless. That's true love. And it works both ways, not just husband to wife, but wife to husband. Recently your Daddy switched a departure time on me for a trip we were taking, cutting my time by nearly 3 hours ... hours I had packed with things I wanted to get done. I flat out told him the earlier time wouldn't work because I had to get these things finished. But then I thought about it some and realized I could rearrange a bit, and if it was that important to him that we leave early, I would make it work. I did that because I love him.

We've talked before about how the best advice I could ever give you is the same advice given to me which is "Marriage is not about give and take, but about give and give and give again" and this advice from Joe enhances that. Phil 2:3 says, "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves." This advice is not just for married couples but for every human being. This is not easy when you have Satan whispering in your ear, "It's all about you," over and over again. But it's important to remember, especially with your spouse. See, since this person is always with you and always there for you, you may get to a point where take advantage of them or even be neglectful. Be sure you remember to put your spouse before yourself.

What makes Joe's advice even more special ... he was living the Word at that very moment. He was taking time out of his day to help me. 

Discussion: Share a time when you sacrificed something you wanted to do for the other person. Share about a time when you were touched when something you wanted to do took presidence. How difficult is it to put each other's needs before your own?

Prayer: Father, we thank you for the example you set in Christ Jesus about putting others before ourselves. Father help us to always remember to copy that behavior, especially with our spouse. And that we never stop. In Jesus name, Amen.