Where's My Seat?

Seating chart or opening seating at the reception? That is a question The Knot magazine tackled in their most recent issue, weighing out the pros and cons of both. Pros for a seating chart included expedited seating and organization and the con being the time consuming part of setting that up. For open seating, the pros were saving on place cards and encouraging mixing and mingling, with the con being confusion for guests seeking a seat.

I'll tell you this, I have never been to a wedding with assigned seating for the guests. We've always just come in and found a seat. I don't recall feeling confused. I do remember wishing we were sitting with so-and-so, but seats were already taken at their table. But that's just hit or miss. However, it's true that people do like to be told what to do, so sometimes having that direction is helpful, welcoming and comforting. Plus then, you don't have the late couple come in and one have to sit at one table and one at another if their is only one seat left at a table. Then again, guests sometime pick up their place card and switch it with someone else's to sit where they want, so then the seating chart isn't being adhered to.

We have read that the larger the guest list, the better is it to have assigned seats for everyone. Others suggest having assigned tables, verses seats. That way people can select who they want to sit next to at their table and it's far easier than giving everyone a specific seat ... again saving time on place cards. Plus it seems couples have fun naming their tables. Kayla and Anton plan on naming the tables after songs in their playlist. When the song is played, that table gets up for food.

Sometimes a plated meal verses buffet or appetizers can help dictate whether you have a seating chart. This way if you have eight guests all ordering filet mignon, you can put them all at the same table, helping the servers. This doesn't work for the couple where one orders chicken and the other orders steak, however.

If you do decide to assign seats, be sure every guest has one person they know at the wedding they can sit with. This can't be helped in all situations, but do what you can so folks have someone to visit with.

So if assigning seats, put co-workers together, church friends together, college buddies together, people of similar interests together, family members together and that person you wanted to set up with another friend together. Don't have a singles table and don't have a kids table if you can avoid it. Apparently both can come off patronizing. And regardless of whether you assign seats or let folks choose seats, it's suggested the bridal party and immediate family have always assigned seats near the newlyweds.

If not using a chart, throw caution to the wind and let guests find their own spot. They are going to get up after the meal for dancing anyways!

Discussion: Which method above do you prefer and why? If you've been to a wedding that used either of the above options, which worked better?

Prayer: Father, we pray you give our couples guidance as to whether they should use a seating chart or have open seating. They do not want their guests to feel uncomfortable or unwelcome, so help them determine what works best for their reception In Christ, Amen.